Thursday, July 28, 2005

THE WAR ON ERROR

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Bush declares the War on Terriers is finished.

By Elaine Meinel Supkis

I just knew this would happen. Bush said, one day, "I will make our allies hostile," and sure enough, he succeeded. He also said he would "fight the war on terriers and bariffs" and he did exactly that, too. He also admitted that he, like the family friend, Mr. bin Laden, woke up every day thinking what he could do to attack America.

He is our President. Now for a moment of shocked silence.

Today, Karen Hughes proves her worth as she changes the course of history with just a few well chosen words. From the New York Times:
The Bush administration is retooling its slogan for the fight against Al Qaeda and other terrorist groups, pushing the idea that the long-term struggle is as much an ideological battle as a military mission, senior administration and military officials said Monday.

In recent speeches and news conferences, Defense Secretary Donald H. Rumsfeld and the nation's senior military officer have spoken of "a global struggle against violent extremism" rather than "the global war on terror," which had been the catchphrase of choice. Administration officials say that phrase may have outlived its usefulness, because it focused attention solely, and incorrectly, on the military campaign.

Gen. Richard B. Myers, chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, told the National Press Club on Monday that he had "objected to the use of the term 'war on terrorism' before, because if you call it a war, then you think of people in uniform as being the solution." He said the threat instead should be defined as violent extremists, with the recognition that "terror is the method they use."

Although the military is heavily engaged in the mission now, he said, future efforts require "all instruments of our national power, all instruments of the international communities' national power." The solution is "more diplomatic, more economic, more political than it is military," he concluded.
Is this like the Monty Python episode about WWI whereby the British intelligence services tell the soldiers to memorize a really dumb (Ein Hund, ja?) joke that causes the German soldiers to laugh to death but won't hurt the British because they speak no German and thus, can't see the humor. Well, shall we all now laugh to death?

You can bet, I will fight this battle!

Extremists such as the American right wing! They are running around this planet, killing people. They harrass and harrangue us here in America. They make threats on our lives, our homes, they..terrorize us ruthlessly. So, their leader is calling for us to struggle to stop them!

So, here it is: STOP IT! STOP IT, GODDAM IT!

Whew. This war is going to be very hard. Alas, we can't vote these extremists out of office because they wrecked our fair voting system. We can use other means to push them out and defeat these extremists. Of course, we have to storm the Vatican, too. But then, that can be arranged, too.

These anti humanist extremists are a hazard to the entire planet for they want to pollute our air and water and raise the world temperatures to an intolerable degree. They want to cut down all our forests and ship all our jobs overseas and in general, destroy us. This is a war we must fight to the bitter end. To stop fascistic, right wing extremists. We must take this fight to the Supreme Court hearings concerning the extreme right wing religious fanatic, Roberts.

He must be removed from the bench!

We must get rid of DeLay, a very notorious extremist. Orrin Hatch...down the booby hatch! This is going to be fun! We should draw up a list of all American extremists and post it on a "Most Unwanted" site. Fight! Fight the good battle.

Down with all right wing extremists!

Down with Fox TV!

Down with them all.

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